The Downside to Self Help: How to Live Fully

Firstly I want to wish you all a Happy New Year! I hope that you had a wonderful Christmas and are ready to get 2014 underway. It’s my intention this year to help you take more steps forward in your life.



I want to kick off the year with a post on how self help can have a downside, and how we can ensure that we only get uplifted by it in our lives.

We can become so addicted and dependent upon reading self help manuals, books, attending seminars and every other form of message media that we forget what it’s truly like to live without having a self help book in our hands, or listening to a spiritual guru’s lecture on our iPod. I’ve been there myself, believe me, and you totally convince yourself that you have your self help addiction under control. You tell yourself that you are balanced yet deep down – and I mean the deepest part inside of you where you rarely like to venture because of fear of having to face up to the truth – you know it’s far from balanced or in control.

Don’t reach for another self help manual to beat the self help addiction!

The way out of this and to heal the addiction, restoring it to a healthy balance rather than a psychotic one, is to start living life. I’m serious. Take it hour by hour, then day by day, before you begin living more on your own terms week by week, month by month and year by year without the self help addiction rearing its unhelpful head.

It’s by actually living our spiritual experiences, and by living our lives that we make progress in our lives.

Making progress in our lives, improving our lives, up levelling our business and generally becoming a better person is the whole goal of self help books, manuals seminars etc. But the danger lies in living from book to book, manual to manual, seminar to seminar and never actually having the time to put those practices into practice in your own life!

I have personally had my social media feeds and email inbox fill up and become bombarded with self help posts; year planners, manuals, workbooks, classes, membership sites and for me it actually got to the point where I had to sign off the internet, close the internet sites down, switch off my mobile updates and avoid them like the plague. It was self help overload and I knew that I allowed myself to continue viewing these messages, I would become drained, tired, and pretty fed up and confused. What I needed at the end of 2013 and the beginning of 2014 was peace, clarity and normality without overload of “work with me to change your life” messages.

I feel uncomfortable posting advertisements and plugs to get clients, I find it irritating to view them, so I try my best to avoid posting them. Of course there are times that I do a quick shout out, but I am of firm belief that;

When the pupil is ready the teacher will appear

Which means that when the prospective client is ready they will find me, I will come into their social circle when they need me to. My job is not to continually plug away for clients and self-help anecdotes, but to set the example of living life to my fullest and I do that by living my life. I get on with my day, I try to juggle the work side of my life and the home side of my life every day, some days the methods work, others prove tricky, but at the end of each day I can say that; “Today I got on with living” which is all the media message I need to share.

So, if you are finding yourself a little confused on what to do this year to up level yourself, take that step forward, make that change or whatever it is you feel compelled to do, my advice to you is this;

Stop running an analysis on your life and just live!

Make 2014 the year that you lived! Follow your own wisdom, take each day as it comes and make each day better than the previous.


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Posted in Empowerment Coaching, Fulfillment Coaching, Life Coach, Life Coaching, Well-Being Coaching

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